ALL OUR SONGS
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Sandy is coming,
Sandy is near.
Sandy look angry,
cuz Sandys a queer
There once was a boy named
Sandy,
he had a disproportional head.
No body ever liked him,
they all wished he was dead.
Sandys so gay, Sandys so queer,
Please hang out anywhere but
here.
Pie in the corner
Hey look , theres a car in the driveway,
over there are some druggies that pass.
Damn, they rolled down their windows,
Oh crap, I best move my ass.
I hate living in the ghetto,
I hate all these deusch bags
Why cant we have peace in this place,
why is sandy a fag?
Yey, I outran those bastards,
but now im out of breathe.
I should go on slimfast,
or maybe lay off the meth.
I hate living in the ghetto,
I hate all these desch bags
Why cant we have peace in this place,
why is sandy a fag?
I cant help but be depressed,
I need some more special k.
The drugs help ease the pain I have,
what else is there to say
but:
I hate living in the ghetto,
I hate all these desch bags
Why cant we have peace in this place,
why is sandy a fag?
(Fade out into chorus)
This Song
My name is Reamus,
And I live in Kentucky.
If I lived in Mexico,
My name would be Rrhemuso.
But I dont live in Mexico,
I actually have rights as a citizen.
I dont drink from a well,
Or even a bucket.
When I sit to eat,
My dinner isnt moving around.
(Say w/o pause):
I live in The United States of America, founded by England and its followers who came here to escape being
persecuted for their religious beliefs that were contradictory of those of the country that they so poorly lived in.
These people were called Pilgrims,
Because they made a religious trip.
They wore funny clothes,
And landed on Plymouth Rock.
They were afraid to be persecuted,
In their native homeland.
I realized these people were kind of like panzies,
just like that dumbass sand monster who hangs with us.
I also realized that you cant make the word persecuted,
without "cute".. or "perse-d"
(speak this, dont sing):
This song was a waste of time,
and space and brain power and it shouldnt exist,
but we are "MahüR" and we dont care so bah.
One more thing before we say good day,
The stupid sand monster named Sandy is extremely gay.
the one song with the title that resembles nothing about whats in the lyrics
this is our 4th or 5th song,
and its all about our school.
we have a stupid principle,
but hey, he thinks hes cool.
we all go to Wentzville,
and we are all in 9th grade.
every freshman has a dream,
and that is to get laid.
The year is almost over,
it really went by fast.
Our drummer did lots of stupid things,
oh god, was that a blast!
Tyler Jones has a mohawk,
and Doug had yellow hair.
Kyle Creech is just so freakin huge,
he could be mistaken for a bear.
We got 2 assistant principals,
and one, Mr. Fohey, is an ass.
Mr. Barro is cool most of the time,
but he took our drummer out of class.
Theres lots about our drummer,
in this horribly stupid song.
But the list of stupid things hes done,
is really really long.
Like once, he gave up masturbation,
and he also licked Laurens shoe.
He licked up a spot o' motor oil,
and bullrushed a locker, too.
Hackman blows the cock,
and he takes it in the ass.
those last two things I said,
is why our drummer got taken out of class.
But Hackman is seriously gay,
hes never had a girl.
His constant anal screwing,
makes me want to hurl.
Another gay kid is Bobby,
he is almost as queer as Todd.
I bet both of them get in bed with Sandy,
and ram their asss with a metal rod.
This is nearing the end of our song,
but please do not be sad.
You can go and listen to our other songs,
and then, you might be glad.
but we all know this band is going nowhere,
and we all know it really sucks.
Someday I wish our school,
would be filled up with a bunch of ducks.
but school is really stupid,
and it wouldnt do anything that way.
And for this songs closing line:
Bobby, Mike, and Sandy are all gay.
Doug's Jock song
Im a jock
Im so cool
I work out
I get chicks at the pool
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
Dont care about school
just wanna get wasted
screw a lot of women
dont care what happens
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
When I get older
I wanna be a CEO
make a lot of money
and control people
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
sports,
sports,
beer,
beer.
Ich habe keine Hose auf
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
(Scream)
Where are my pants? (3x)
Maybe the gay Sand monster stole them and pu tthem down his pants to make his cock look bigger for the other
guys.
(scream)
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
Ich habe
Ich habe keine
Ich habe keine Hose auf
(Scream)
Where are my pants? (3x)
Maybe the gay Sand monster stole them and pu tthem down his pants to make his cock look bigger for the other
guys.
(scream)
This Song Blows
There are things you overlook
in your entire existence in life
you forget about the simple things
like your air conditioner or your wife
this song is about one of those
it might make you sound like a fool
but you might sometimes forget her
the one that will keep you cool
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
When life isnt good at all
and the heat just makes it worse
just turn on your air conditioner
and lift that dreaded curse
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
it stays outside all the time
through all the rain and snow
but somehow it always runs
it always has the power to blow
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
you might think it looks ugly
sitting next to your nice shack
but you would really miss it
if your hosue was as hot as Iraq
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
just remember all the people
who didnt have them around
the ones who died of the heat
the ones in the poor part of town
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
this little thing is quite important
it can very easily save your life
that is why I have chosen it
to be more important than your wife
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
an air conditioner doesn't bitch at you
and it wont constantly nag
when you won't cuddle at night
it won't think you're a fag
THE AIR CONDITIONER!
(repeat, fade out)
Beards and Turbans Don't Make You a Terrorist
Bin laden lived in Afghanistan
when he started this terrorist shit
he is such a rich and powerful man
until he dies, he wont ever quit
does anyone remember in 93
when he blew up an American embassy
we didnt really do that, but oh well
never the less, hes still goin to hell
he got his men to hijack planes
and fly them into some shit
but it happened 2 years ago
so get the hell over it!
we bombed that country
and we killed that whore
now we start with saddam
and started a war
president bush is stupid
he doesnt realize obvious stuff
he just knows he can bomb countries
and he thinks that makes him tough
well I got news for ya george
and you need to listen right here
youre not made a terrorist
by having a turban and a beard
terror is just a state of mind
if you dont believe, it wont exist
and if you cant understand that
maybe your face should meet my fist
im done with this stupid song
but our president is still queer
he needs to bomb the white house
so he can get his stupid ass outta here
The Old Days
Keiths normal now
but he used to be fat
we cant make fun of him
what happened to that
you need to gain it back
youre too normal now
we want you to look
more like a cow
pudgy guys are cool
so keith, be like them
and you better not think
of hitting the gym
eat ur lucky charms
and your fruit loops too
chocolate chip cookies
and lots of other junk foods
whyd you get in shape
you shouldve stayed grand
youd be outta shape
and couldnt play in the band
you broke your zip wire
and broke that locker in the hall
you used to weigh a ton
whyd you lose it all?
we miss the old keith
we miss making all the cracks
please keith, for us
just gain it all back
